10 Romance Movies That Aren't Worth Your Time, According to Roger Ebert (2024)

The grand and glorious world of romance movies is meant to make your heart flutter and to sweep you off your feet. After all, when the universal language of love is spoken with a cinematic flair, who can resist? Or at least, that’s the idea. Because, while the romance genre is undoubtedly one of the most accessible and emotive in all of filmmaking, somehow, some movies just cannot seem to get it right.

Roger Ebert, the late, great film critic whose discerning eye and biting wit were often the bane of directors and screenwriters, has included some interesting movies in his Most Hated list of movies. He knew a thing or two about the power of love and was not one to suffer gladly when it came to bad depictions of romance on the big screen. He’d call out the painfully clichéd and downright hollow romance movies as they are. And so, we’ve narrowed down a list of the 10 worst romance movies of all time that left Ebert shaking his head in absolute disappointment.

10 ‘Flashdance’ (1983)

1 ½ Stars

Flashdance

Where to Watch

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Release Date

April 15, 1983

Cast

Jennifer Beals , Michael Nouri , Lilia Skala , Sunny Johnson , Kyle T. Heffner , Lee Ving , Ron Karabatsos , Phil Bruns , Micole Mercurio

Runtime

97 Minutes

In the same vein as other musical romance movies of the 1980s like Footloose and Purple Rain, this Adrian Lyne-directed movie follows Alex Owens, an 18-year-old welder by day and a go-go dancer by night, who wishes nothing more than to become a professional ballerina. Her blue-collared life takes a turn when she catches the eye of Nick Hurley, the owner of the steel mill where she works and the man who encourages her to pursue her dreams.

A Dance Drama Driven by Clichés

With Jennifer Beals and Michael Nouri at the helm, Flashdance could have become a cultural phenomenon and amazed audiences with its electrifying dance sequences and catchy soundtrack. And it did, for a small part. The movie was also a surprise box-office success, grossing over $200 million worldwide, and it featured award-winning songs that continue to be danced on. But otherwise, according to Ebert, it signifies nothing and is “not as interesting as the real-life story of Jennifer Beals.”

9 ‘Betty Blue’ (1986)

1 ½ Star​​​​​​​s

Betty Blue is a steamy French romance that touches its toes in the psychological drama genre for a wholesome part. It follows Zorg, a simple repairman who falls in love with the wild and unpredictable Betty. Their relationship starts off on a passionate note at a seaside resort but quickly spirals out of control when Betty’s mental health gets worse, and she exhibits strange and impulsive behavior.

An Offbeat But Flawed Romance

If a movie as intense and tragic as Betty Blue got made today, it would contain meaning and choose to focus on both the physical relationship between the characters and the genuine catharsis that came with making out of their destructive phase alive. The movie also managed to make millions in France, holds a 78% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, and was nominated for an Academy Award for Best Foreign Language Film. Yet, Roger Ebert begins his review with “Love is not the same thing as nudity,” which sums up his opinion.

8 ‘Friends’ (1971)

1 Star

Co-written, directed, and produced by Lewis Gilbert, Friends is a British-French teenage romance that tells the story of Paul Harrison, a neglected 15-year-old English boy living in Paris, and Michelle Latour, a 14-year-old French orphan girl who is living in the city with her cousin. Both free-spirited teenagers run away from their homes to find solace in each other’s company, eventually settling in Camargue. But it’s not long until reality challenges their situation.

Disturbing Portrayal of Teenage Innocence

What begins as an exploration of love, friendship, responsibilities, and societal expectations, soon descends into a horrible attempt at romance in Friends. With its narrative, the movie had potential to be a bold and unconventional addition to the genre, but instead, the characters turned out to be empty vessels, and the social commentary was misdirected. Ebert gave the movie a one-star rating and called it the “most sickening piece of corrupt slop I’ve seen in a long time.”

“It has so many idyllic romps through the fields, so many sunsets, so many phony emotional peaks and so much pandering to the youth audience in it that, finally, it becomes a grotesque parody of itself.”

7 ‘Staying Alive’ (1983)

1 Star

Staying Alive

PG

Drama

Music

Release Date

July 11, 1983

Cast

Cynthia Rhodes , John Travolta , Finola Hughes , Steve Inwood , Julie Bovasso , Charles Ward , Steve Bickford , Patrick Brady , Norma Donaldson , Jesse Doran , Joyce Hyser , Deborah Jenssen , Robert Martini , Sarah M. Miles , Tony Munafo , Susan Olar , Cindy Perlman , Ross St. Phillip , Kurtwood Smith , Frank Stallone Jr. , Nell Alano , Randy Allaire , Audrey K. Baranishyn , Paula Beyers , Melita Brock-Warner

Runtime

93 minutes

Just when people thought the disco fever had finally burned itself out, Sylvester Stallone came along with a misguided follow-up to the iconic dance drama, Saturday Night Fever. John Travolta came strutting back to the stage in Staying Alive. He’d now moved from Brooklyn to Manhattan and was working as a waiter and dance instructor while desperately trying to recapture the magic of his past glory and make it big on Broadway.

A Cinematic Jukebox With no Heart

It managed to earn $127 million at the worldwide box office, but Staying Alive just so happens to be the oldest film to hold a score of 0% on Rotten Tomatoes. It lacks the same sense of purpose, drama, and emotion as the original, leaves audiences with a hollow heart, has a cohesive narrative, and relies on dance numbers a little too much. Ebert was less than impressed; he gave Staying Alive one star and described it as a movie that’s “so ludicrous it has to be seen to be believed.”

6 ‘Camille 2000’ (1969)

1 Star

A 1969 adaptation of Alexandre Dumas fils' novel, titled La Dame aux Camélia, Camille 2000 is a visually intriguing but emotionally vacant movie that follows Marguerite Gautier, a beautiful and captivating courtesan who gets enamored with the young French businessman, Armand Duval. But Marguerite’s lavish life of partying, drugs, and casual relationships comes in the way and Armand tries to help but their ill-fated romance meets a tragic end.

Lavish but Soulless Erotic Drama

Camille 2000 was panned greatly by critics, and even though some found strength in its opulent sets and ultra-plush environments that went hand-in-hand with the cultural representation back in the day, most called the movie out for not investing in its characters enough and for its excessive nudity. Again, Roger Ebert gave the romance a one-star review that read:

“Camille 2000 is shot in color. It is dubbed into English instead of subtitled. It is wide screen. It has a pretty girl in it. Her name is Daniele Gaubert. Whoever painted that big sign in front of the theater has an accurate critical sense. The sign says: "See Daniele Gaubert presented in the nude ... and with great frequency." That captures the essence of Metzger's art.”

5 ‘Saving Silverman’ (2001)

½ Star

Saving Silverman

PG-13

Comedy

Crime

Romance

Release Date

February 9, 2001

Cast

Jason Biggs , Steve Zahn , Jack Black , Amanda Peet , Amanda Detmer , R. Lee Ermey , Neil Diamond , Kyle Gass

Runtime

90 Minutes

Saving Silverman is a delightful and subversive romantic comedy about three friends – Darren Silverman, Wayne LeFessier, and J.D. McNugent – who have been Neil Diamond fans all their lives. When Darren falls for Judith, an overbearing and manipulative woman, and decides to marry her, Wayne and J.D. hatch a plan to kidnap her and convince him that she’s dead so Darren can get back together with his first love, Sandy.

A Buddy Comedy that Misfires

Hilarious, absurd, and outrageous, is how most people would describe Saving Silverman. It stars Jason Biggs, Steve Zahn and Jack Black in memorable roles and uses crude humor to generate laughs. Legendary critic Roger Ebert, however, found the movie to be long and unfocused, where each scenario overstood its welcome. In his half-star review, he urged Biggs to choose better roles and also wrote:

“... you should see it, as an example of the lowest slopes of the bell-shaped curve. This is the kind of movie that gives even its defenders fits of desperation.”

4 ‘The Blue Lagoon’ (1980)

½ Star

Directed by Randal Kleiser and adapted from the novel by Henry De Vere Staacpoole, The Blue Lagoon begins with two young cousins, Emmeline and Richard, getting shipwrecked on a remote tropical island. As they go from childhood to adulthood and navigate the challenges of survival, they discover love in isolation and let their friendship evolve into a romantic relationship.

A Sanitized, Superficial Love Story

While the film’s sun-drenched visuals may have initially captured audiences’ attention, it was not enough to sway Ebert, who called The Blue Lagoon the “dumbest movie of the year” and pondered just why it was made in the first place in his one-and-a-half star review of the movie. Starring Brooke Shields and Christopher Atkins, who share no chemistry at all, the movie handles its sensitive themes poorly, is not realistic, and idealizes the core romance instead of exploring the complexity of the main characters’ situations.

3 ‘The Pick-up Artist’ (1987)

½ Star

The Pick-up Artist

PG-13

Romance

Comedy

Crime

Release Date

September 18, 1987

Cast

Molly Ringwald , Robert Downey Jr. , Dennis Hopper , Danny Aiello , Harvey Keitel , Vanessa Williams , Mildred Dunnock , Brian Hamill , Tamara Bruno , Angie Kempf , Polly Draper , Frederick Koehler , Robert Towne , Victoria Jackson , Lorraine Bracco , Bob Gunton , Christine Baranski , Tony Sirico , Joe Spinell , Clem Caserta , Victor Argo , Fred Melamed , Christine Sclafani , Alexis Cruz , Sidney Armus

Runtime

81 minutes

Another worst romance movie, according to Roger Ebert, is The Pick-up Artist, written and directed by James Toback. In it, Robert Downey Jr. plays Jack, a charming young man who spends all his time flirting with women, but his life takes an unexpected turn when he meets Molly Ringwald’s Randy, a strong-willed museum tour guide who does not fall for his tricks. Jack, desperate to woo Randy, teams up with her father and gets entangled with Randy's mobster boyfriend, Alonzo.

Romance Movie That Missed the Mark

Ebert’s half-star review of The Pick-Up Artist was nothing short of scathing, as he criticized the movie for its lack of depth and superficial performances. He described it as “an appallingly silly movie, from its juvenile comic overture to its dreadfully sincere conclusion” one that fails to engage audiences and uses Molly Ringwald’s charm to its benefit. Audiences did not share the same views as him, with many finding the predictable plot intriguing and the Brat Pack characters fun to watch.

2 ‘Can't Buy Me Love’ (1987)

½ Star

An ill-conceived teenage rom-com that recycles the same old formula where a nerdy guy likes the popular girl, Can’t Buy Me Love follows Ronald, a socially awkward high school student who dreams of boosting his popularity by offering $1,000 to the school’s most beautiful cheerleader, Cindy, to pretend to be his girlfriend for a month. Cindy agrees, Ronald becomes popular. But eventually, he discovers that love can’t be bought.

A Cringe-Worthy Attempt at Teen Rom-Com

Can’t Buy Me Love may have initially appeared to be a harmless, feel-good romantic comedy. It even had the potential to be a guilty pleasure had the narrative not steered into the cynicism and superficiality of the one-dimensional characters and their motives and desires. And that’s precisely why Ebert gave the movie only half a star and called it “as naive as the day is long.”

“If 'Can’t Buy Me Love' had been intended as a satirical attack on American values – if cynicism had been its target – we might be on to something here. But no. On the basis of the evidence, the people who made this movie are so materialistic they actually think this is a 'teenage comedy.' Can’t they see the screenplay’s rotten core?”

1 ‘Dirty Love’ (2005)

0 Stars

Dirty Love

R

Comedy

Romance

Release Date

September 23, 2005

Cast

Eddie Kaye Thomas , Jenny McCarthy , Carmen Electra , Guillermo Diaz , Victor Webster , Kam Heskin , Jessica Collins , Noah Harpster , Lochlyn Munro , Kathy Griffin , Renee Albert , Jay Johnston , David O'Donnell , Forbes March , Bob Glouberman , Judith Drake , Deryck Whibley , Tabitha Taylor , Rob Steiner , Frank Alvarez , Joyce Bulifant , Roger Perry , Jonathan Torrens , Monty Bane , Brian George

Runtime

91 minutes

According to Roger Ebert, Dirty Love is perhaps the worst romance movie of all time, and it’s pretty obvious in his zero-star review. But before getting into that, here’s the plot of the movie. Rebecca Sommers is a photographer who finds out that her boyfriend is cheating on her. Devastated and emotionally thrown off, she tries to get revenge by going on a series of disastrous dates with unsavory men, only for true love to find its way to her in the end.

An Unfunny Disaster

Directed by and starring the controversial TV personality, Jenny McCarthy-Wahlberg ( in what is also her screenwriting debut), Dirty Love is cringe on all levels. It is a trainwreck of a movie that enjoys its tasteless humor and suffers from poor direction. In his review, Roger Ebert is quick to pick on all these things, calling the movie “hopelessly incompetent” and “so pitiful it doesn’t rise to the level of badness.” Interestingly, Dirty Love won the Golden Raspberry Awards for Worst Picture, Worst Director, Worst Screenplay, and Worst Actress.